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:iconyour-first-boyfriend: More from your-first-boyfriend


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Literature by Kareemadeem

Literature by SavageFrog


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Submitted on
February 17, 2014
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      The ocean and the sky seemed to be an infinite stain of slate grey; the horizon just an imaginary concept. The sky a mass of churning gray cement and the infinitely deep ocean reflecting the forsaken heavens above like a dusty mirror that sprawled out beyond the corners of space and time. I could see the distorted faces of drowned sailors woven into the clouds- screaming. 
     The sea seemed to taunt me. Its glassy surface like a smoky marble floor; promising me a stable foothold and beckoning me to come dance and waltz on its perfectly smooth and polished surface. It was so tempting, so very tempting. But with every step closer the ocean seemed to grow more excited and restless, seemingly forgetting its masquerade of serenity. I didn't care. Why should I? The sea can't lie to me, I know what it wants. 
     I step closer. The thick mud silently bubbles as it absorbs my feet; its color reminiscent of whale skin. I wonder if it swallows up sound as well. 
     I can't even hear my own heartbeat. 
     I take my time getting to the edge of the beach where the mud and water kiss. The water swallows up the mud and retreats only to creep up again. And again. And again. I wonder how long this pulse has been going on for. A steady and silent marine heartbeat; never faltering. The water licks my feet and the ocean stirs just a little more. Can it taste me? 
    The water is unbelievably frigid. My lower body is already numb. Apprehension overcomes me. Is this truly what I want? I turn to the beach. I can make out the ashen boulders and mountains in the distance; the heavy marine mists shrouding their bases like filthy alabaster wool. But the ocean eggs me on, the current gently easing me deeper into it like a mother coaxing her child into an unfamiliar edifce and soon I'm gently caressed by the bubbling seafoam and letting myself be led to my slaughter.
     The swirling water is up to my chest now. My feet can no longer push against the mud and rock. I'm at the mercy of the ocean now, but wasn't I always? A light rain gently sprinkles down from somewhere above and collects on my hair and face. The dewdrops of rain mingle with the salty drops of water on my cheeks. Are these tears? 
     My body is giving way to the ocean, but my primal instinct to survive is pushing me on and refusing to be smothered. But the waves are eternally patient. Back and forth, side to side they froth and ripple and bubble. My limbs are filled with lead and I feel like a discarded marionette as my arms and legs sway back and forth in the water.
     I can feel myself sinking. I don't struggle, there is no point now. I allow a smile, content with my resignation to my ultimate fate- everyone's ultimate fate. The water stings my eyes as my body slowly descends into the foreboding abyss of the great open ocean. There is no life here in the blossom of darkness. The dark expanse of the sea is truly a singularity of emptiness. A womb that only bears a maddening nothingness and a deafening silence. And soon the inky abyss will swallow up my limp body and the sea shall remain a lifeless void once more.
Woo, final version of my little ocean short. :la:

I'm quite pleased with it, I hope you enjoy it. 

EDIT:

A DAILY DEVIATION OMG 
I AM REALLY HONORED AND HUMBLED JUST
I NEVER IMAGINED THIS WOULD EVER HAPPEN
AND SO SOON

THANK YOU SO MUCH GrimFace242 :la:
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Daily Deviation

Given 2014-02-20
Waltzing on the Ocean Floor by BloodyRoyalty is simply marvelous with just enough description that it isn't overwhelming and remarkable imagery that you can't walk away from. ( Featured by GrimFace242 )
:icontvtvt:
tvtvt Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2014
well deserved DD! blew me away!
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you <3
Reply
:iconwendyllee31:
wendyllee31 Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2014
absolutely AWESOME ~ ( & congrats on the Daily Deviation... you deserved it!)
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! :squee:
Reply
:iconney0n:
ney0n Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Wow, dude, this is probably a little bit late (and sorry about that...), but SUPER CONGRATS for DD! You deserved it, no doubt. ^-^
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
its ok


and omg thank you <33
Reply
:iconney0n:
ney0n Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
np
Reply
:icondogtoothpaste:
dogtoothpaste Featured By Owner Apr 8, 2014   Traditional Artist
This made me cry. I never cry. You are amazing. AAaaaah
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
thank you omg <33
Reply
:iconmountainrhythm:
MountainRhythm Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
HOLY BALLS FATHER
LET ME DROWN IN YOUR WRITING
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
AW YO MAN THATS SWEET
Reply
:iconmountainrhythm:
MountainRhythm Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
*CONTINUOUSLY DROWNS IN YOUR WRITING*
HALP, I'M IN TOO DEEP
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
i want to do an Adele joke

i really do
Reply
:iconmountainrhythm:
MountainRhythm Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'M DROOOOOOWNINGGGGGG
but please do
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
YOURE ROLLING IN THE DEEP
Reply
:iconmountainrhythm:
MountainRhythm Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
IT HAS MY HEART AND SOUUUUUUUUUL
Reply
:iconraikukittu:
RaikuKittu Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2014  Student Digital Artist
raikukittu.deviantart.com/art/…
finally done with that fan art ;;
Reply
:iconc-a-harland:
C-A-Harland Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Student Writer
The imagery in this is beautiful, I particularly love the line like a dusty mirror that sprawled out beyond the corners of space and time. 
The personification of the ocean is wonderful too, the marine pulse is such a fantastic image. This whole piece is really evocative and rice. Well done.
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for your kind words! :la:


Reply
:iconbladebites:
BladeBites Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You are so unbelievably talented. I found it so hard to believe that you were fifteen, I envy that. You sound like a seasoned author, this kind of talent usually takes years to master. When I was your age (only a year ago, but improvement-wise that's a long time) I was still mixing up "your" and "you're". 
Someone needs to do the world a favor and make you famous. ;w;:heart:
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Aahh, thank you so much! :happybounce:

Aha, "seasoned author", you're too kind. ;u; 
I guess reading tons of things from different authors helps after all! :XD:

Shameless advertising If you think my work is good, you'll love my dear friend UndeadPuppetMaster99's work. They're a prodigal writer (and they're just fourteen !!) 
Their writing really inspires me to write. :D

And aha, one day I'll be a bestselling author, just wait and see! 
Hopefully.
Reply
:iconbladebites:
BladeBites Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I don't doubt it! And I'd actually like to thank you for introducing me to their work, it's lovely and I wouldn't have found it otherwise. ;w;
Reply
:iconundeadpuppetmaster99:
UndeadPuppetMaster99 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I see you advertising me, thanks to the new MENTION FEATURE ON DEVIANTART. Bless ur soul ilu man, I'm glad I could inspire you because your writing has improved so so much over time, you've come so far and I can't believe that I helped motivate you, that's awesome dude.
You are so going to be a bestselling author, I am also, and we are going to recommend each others' books to all our friends and stuff. Livin the life. Good job. Thank you for telling people about me you are great.
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
yes man you've inspired me so much your writing just aahhh ripip my nonexistent kokoro bc its just am  a  z e <33

yes and we will have book conventions and be all cool and authory yeesss 

nO PROBLEM DUDE YOUR WORK IS GOLDEN "SPIRES" IS STILL MY FAVE STORY

KEEP WRITING DUDE 
IF I CAN GET A DD YOU CAN GET LIKE 10 GUARANTEED I SWEAR UPON MY JAR OF PICKLED HUMAN FETUSES
Reply
:iconundeadpuppetmaster99:
UndeadPuppetMaster99 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
ahhhhh thank u i'm so so glad!! keep writing keep writing u are also am  a  z e

it will be so gr9 we can have book signings together n shit and like, obv since we are so amazing there will eventually be movies of our books and we can go to the premier n stuff, and we can have fandoms and people will cosplay and argue and write fanfics and draw fanart and make theories that only we know the truth of. we will have fans, man, we will be author bros 5ever

thaaaaank youuuuuu, it's actually my favorite too! just the whole idea of creepy-as-heckie abandoned alien planets. i wish i could go more into the lore of it but ehhhh maybe someday i should do more

HHHHH I KNOW I HAVE TO KEEP WRITING. GOTTA DO MY BEEEEST
THANK U I WILL HOPE FOR THE DAY
do you really have a jar of pickled human fetuses? my 5th grade teacher had a pickled chicken fetus or carcass or something in a jar. she showed us once.
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
legions of fans sounds nice

and omg omg it's actually pretty depressing how I'm already envisioning the movie for a fucking novel I haven't even started yet :lol:

Alien planets :heart:

no i don't have a jar of pickled fetuses but i do have some cat jaw in a plastic bag hidden in a Bush on my lawn somewhere
Reply
:iconundeadpuppetmaster99:
UndeadPuppetMaster99 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
absolutely.( if not a little scary)

hahaha no it's ok, when i was in 5th grade i wrote this story and all throughout 5th and 6th grade i not only was coming up with the credits soundtrack, but secretly observing random kids from my school to see if they would be good actors as the main characters. i seriously thought that i was going to get it published and it would become a movie.
i still make soundtracks for my stories occasionally. like the one i told you about with the mechas, i have a playlist for that. those are fun to make.

the best! i love alien planets, and alien cultures and history and how they've evolved differntly from humans, and what the planet is like - not just climate, but the civilization and natural resources. and alien technology. alien technology that makes cool buildings. alien technology that destroys worlds and stuff. alien technology that creates new worlds. the possibilities are endless it's 10:42 pm im so excited about alien planets right now

that's awesome hwere did you get it?? send pics
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I am also guilty of prose soundtracks lul

YES ALIEN CULTURES
one of my pet peeves tho is when movies and books makes like a planet seemed unified it's just unrealistic imo
I'm p sure aliens would also have countries and whatnot 

I think my dad threw it away :<
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconopinionsprofile:
OpinionsProfile Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014
I was eighteen before I stopped mixing up your and you're.  Don't even get me started on to vs too. 
Reply
:iconbladebites:
BladeBites Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Aaahhhh I still have the vs problem to this day. ;w;
Reply
:icong-a-animefan4:
G-A-AnimeFan4 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Absolutely ASTONISHING that you were able to write such a beautiful peice. Amazing work!!
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Aah, thanks so much for your kind words! :la:
Reply
:icong-a-animefan4:
G-A-AnimeFan4 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You're welcome^_^
Reply
:iconshadowedacolyte:
ShadowedAcolyte Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014
I got a strong "The Awakening" vibe from this. Thanks for sharing.
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for taking the time to comment. It means a lot. :)
Reply
:iconraikukittu:
RaikuKittu Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Student Digital Artist
This truly is an amazing and beautiful piece of writing. I love the mysterious way it's written, and the whole plot of it, as well as the beautiful message behind this. 
You know what?
Simple every-day words comming from only a mortal human being like me cannot describe this amazing piece of writing. <3
Mind if I do fan-art? c:
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Aahh, you're too kind omg 
I'm really happy you liked it. 

And go for it dude! I'd love to see it once you finish if you ever do it :dummy:
Reply
:iconraikukittu:
RaikuKittu Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Haha of course I like it, in fact, I love it. <3
And yeah, I'll try to get it done tomorrow, because I really want to do fan-art for this beautiful piece since it's really inspiring~ <3 I may not be the best artist, but hopefully it'll still turn out decent c:
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Can't wait! :la:
Reply
:iconraikukittu:
RaikuKittu Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2014  Student Digital Artist
I finished it...
But it's so ugly that I don't want to post it...
It looked so much better in my mind...
//Runs off to do a re-do//
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Aww dude, it's fine if it's not perfect as long as you tried your best :la:
Reply
:icontruthistruth:
TruthisTruth Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Congratulations on the Daily Deviation! :clap:
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you  so much!  :heart:
Reply
:icontruthistruth:
TruthisTruth Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome!
Reply
:iconlintu47:
lintu47 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Congrats on the DD! :dalove:
Have a nice day! :party:
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! :D
Reply
:iconlintu47:
lintu47 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
My pleasure! :love: by CookiemagiK
Reply
:icondanoheirity:
danoheirity Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
The imagery is always unexpected and therein lies the incredible power of this piece of writing. There is also, for me anyway, a bitter sweet tone that captures our ambiguous relationship to all that we are. A truly wonderful piece of writing.
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for the kind words. uwu

I'm really glad you enjoyed it :dummy:
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